The research process continues in a very interesting way. You married very happy, lovingly, making love. But what happens over time that your partner’s behavior starts to bother you? There are two appropriate answers to this question: anger and fear. Why anger? In the romantic stages of the relationship, people are relatively easy to get closer because they expect to fulfill their desires. They see their wives as their mothers, fathers, doctors and therapists, and they think that they all meet in one body. They feel angry and betrayed when they realize, months or years later, that their spouse is not for them but for their own salvation. The verbal agreement is broken. By building a spiritual barricade between them to retaliate, actually “I’m angry with you for not meeting my emotional needs!” says. Then they begin to systematically seek pleasure and satisfaction outside of the relationship.
Another reason for couples avoiding intimacy is fear; especially the fear of suffering. On the subconscious level, many people react to their spouse as if they were hostile. Your subconscious perceives your spouse as someone who will satisfy your desires first. Any individual who later seems to avoid gratification is immediately considered a source of pain and is thought to be giving life to the ghost of death. If your spouse does not take care of you and does not meet your basic needs, part of you is afraid of dying inside and believes that your spouse will provide it. Combined with the basic lack of interest, verbal attacks, and sometimes physical abuse, the partner turns into an even stronger enemy. The reason he keeps away from his wife at the subconscious level is the fear of death. Now you understand better, don’t you, my friend, the root of many problems you had with your wife? I think these explanations are enough for you … :)
In short, as the illusion of love gradually wears off, husband and wife:
- To provoke each other’s repressed feelings and behaviors
- To bleed childhood wounds
- They start to reflect their own negative sides to each other.